It Matters To Me

it seems to be reoccurring topic. Me. + Dating. = Single.

i was talking to a dear friend a couple of days ago, asking for advice on a guy, i have know my entire life practically. what to do, and how to get it across that i don’t feel the same.

my friend me told me i was a lot like his girlfriend. personality wise. flirty without trying to be. but it just because i am friendly, he explains. he continued in saying that the guy was just stupid for trying to pursue me and other girls at the same time. because he was talking about them to me. in his words, “its Melissa!” which threw me off, and continued in saying that he wouldn’t have a chance because he is dating other girls, and pursuing me at the same time, and it would never happen, because the guy i am looking for should only want me … not other girls too.

this came as a surprise to me… because he is a dear dear friend of mine. however, the fact that he knew that much about me, really made me think how great of friends we are. even if we are work friends, we are friends, and i could pin him to a T as well.

——

this happened a couple days ago, and i know that it will stick with me forever. because its reasons like this that we are friends. why i believe he is one person i never what to not be friends with. i hope i know him my entire life.

1 month ago

dear boy i have known since middle school,

please get over it. over the fact that i don’t like you the same. i sucks i know.

however, i am not going to sit there and lie to you, and say that i feel different, only to hurt us both in the end. you are my friend and i don’t want anything more than that with you. i am sorry, but at the same time i’m not. i’m proud of myself for telling you the truth, even if it may hurt your feelings, you know the truth, and you know that i’m being real with you.

you are one of my greatest friends, and a friends that has been in my life for a long time, and you know that i wouldn’t start something unless i knew that it was right, or that i felt that it was a good thing. your friendship to me is very important, and i would hate to see anything ruin it. but i feel that the differences in feeling will ruin it.

i can’t take the drunk texts from you asking why i won’t date you.

and when we hang out, now i feel like its super awkward. and that feeling is not what i want. i want our friendship back, the one where i could talk to you about anything, from family to the guy i was dating, and the same with you… but we don’t talk anymore. and you claim to have these feeling, but you are dating other girls…. im confused. if anything.

so one last time… i don’t like you, like you like me. i want our friendship to remind, but i feel it will end, if it keeps getting awkward…. i don’t know what else to say. ugh!

1 month ago